Glimmers of optimism are showing up tonight.
I had a ‘random’ conversation with @holly.high_priestess the night before that helped to move some stagnant energy. Today I packed to visit family.
I barely touched my phone. Didn’t get on the computer. Kept to myself while packing.
I have to regularly re-remember the value of getting away from excessive stimulation and external inputs.
Multiple times throughout the day I felt emotions more viscerally than usual (otherwise probably having ignored them via opening a new tab, watching another video, sending a message to another person).
This time I let go of the schedule, the to-do list, the need to be connected online.
Instead spending that time being more present with myself, my heart & thoughts, and eventually family.
I consciously let go of giving gifts on time this year. The stress of the apartment was only adding on and making it difficult to function nominally.
Yet, family chose to give gifts (even though I would have been fine just being there and not receiving anything).
One of the gifts I received was a set of 6 books by Paulo Coelho.
Specifically: The Alchemist.
It was on my list for a while and I was itching to read it.
As everyone went to sleep, I was faced with a fork in the road moment:
Get on the computer and do my usual thing, or…
Go carve out a nook and listen to music, be with my own thoughts, and journal.
I chose the road for alone time.
Because of that, I feel as though I have been able to be considerably more present, calm, and connected (#chainbreaker) than usual.
More in tune with my heart and intuition.
What has surfaced from journaling, being introspective, and reading created many quiet-but-profound moments that have the propensity to alter the course of tomorrow and the coming months.
These moments, these journal entries serve as a reminder that all it takes is to proactively be present with myself and the moment.
Creating the space to let the heart speak.
And the bravery to -actually- listen.